Tunde Chris Odediran
You may easily dismiss this as an unserious article, but this is one of the most serious conversations I can have with readers.
I write to ask those who are working hard in life to reserve time to enjoy themselves instead of watching life pass by.
An executive at the company I worked for until some months ago died suddenly. Larry and I had a long working relationship spanning nearly 15 years.
He was one of the few engineers capable of managing multibillion dollar projects and he was a superstar.
Over the years, our working relationship grew from stressful and demanding to mutual respect, even friendship.
Larry was a much older fellow, knocking 70 at the time of his sudden death. But he was young at heart, always working, exploring ideas and tireless. He was feared by the lazy and idle.
For several years, he spent time delivering large infrastructure projects and his last was a major rail system.
Once in a while, when he traveled down to the headquarters of the company where I was, he would pop up by my cube just to talk about technology, in addition to sharing stories about his support issues and his life as an engineer.
Danish author, Hans Christian Andersen, describes this need of man best when he wrote: “Enjoy life. There’s plenty of time to be dead.”
When time came for him to retire, Larry delayed so he could hand over the major rail system to an American city.
The retirement had been announced on the Intranet and send-offs were being arranged.
Two weeks to retirement, he slumped while working on his backyard and died.
A lifetime of preparation for rest delivered no rest.
Retirement savings would never be spent on retirement. Larry worked and then died. The only rest that arrived for him was RIP.
It got me thinking. Many of us have our priorities skewed.
We graduate from school to go into the labour market. Once you are able to rent a flat, marriage follows. Then children.
Children’s school fees, extended family and other responsibilities soon preoccupy a working man or woman.
Some do, but most others toil without remembering to grab a little bit of time to enjoy life’s fine beauties. It is wrong to fail to enjoy.
Even the scriptures emphasise the importance of living life to the fullest or, better put, an enjoyed life. “So go ahead.
Eat your food with joy, and drink your wine with a happy heart, for God approves of this!” said Solomon in Ecclesiastes 9.
Danish author, Hans Christian Andersen, describes this need of man best when he wrote: “Enjoy life. There’s plenty of time to be dead.”
The problem with most of us is that we don’t know what to do with ourselves, before or after the children leave home.
Our brains are well tuned for work and poorly adjusted for play. Yet, life demands a good balance of both.
Those who fail to appreciate this simple prerequisite may either not live well or live long. One of the rules of Christian living is to rest one of seven days.
Even the land must rest. Even God rested. But man tries to be stronger than God.
For a lot of people who have lived most of their lives raising children, life is all about raising children.
It makes perfect sense that once those kids are no longer there, adjusting to a new way of living as empty nesters becomes difficult.
This is why life should not be lived in phases. Don’t set aside a portion of your life until later.
Throughout life, it is important to have a blend of work and play.
That’s the biblical prescription and it is also a medical and psychological truth that those who take time off for leisure will likely live a more meaningful and longer life.
A lot of people die before their time because they failed to grasp the importance of play and rest.
In Nigeria, where people retire in their prime, the transition is poorly calibrated.
The free time is spent on things that have little value. Many throw themselves into activities that are meaningless and opportunities to get more out of life is lost.
To a lot of people, even when they have the freedom to explore life, the question they ask themselves is, “what have I achieved?” Even when it makes sense to take a break to enjoy, they continue to work.
Instead of enjoying the moment we find ourselves in, many just race into the next moment, chasing after what Abraham Maslow described as self-actualisation in his theory of human motivation.
One traditional or academic title is not enough. Being a chief is too little; everybody is addressed a chief – Otunba is better. The title must scream. The whole town must know the man of unsurpassable achievements.
But where does it end? Definitely, it ends in the grave. This, King Solomon saw that, when he wrote: “For when you go to the grave, there will be no work or planning or knowledge or wisdom.”
Author Bill McKenna points out that: “Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in one pretty and well-preserved piece, but to slide across the finish line broadside, thoroughly used up, worn out, leaking oil, and shouting Geronimo!!!”
Life is to be explored; it is an adventure and that is the point most people miss.
I know a lot of Africans in the United States who have never experienced a real vacation. They work, work and work! And when they think they are on vacation, all they do is visit a friend or family in another city, missing the opportunity of seeing the world.
Some years ago, I met the wife of a Nigerian in Roselle, New Jersey, who had slumped and died at work as a nurse. He had just finished a mansion in Nigeria. It was a widely shared story.
It was no surprise when a Nigerian professor somewhere in America argued recently in a WhatsApp discussion that going home for the new yam festival provided more value than being at Disneyworld, Orlando. Adventurism and vista are distant in his life of routine.
Many Nigerians have never had a real vacation.
The local tourist attractions are hardly patronized. The warm springs, wildlife reservations, waterfalls and museums that could spur economic activities hardly attract enough tourists to break even. “Mama’s Buka” is better that Ikogosi Warm Springs.
It was just a few years ago that Tinapa Resort was opened in Cross River State, Nigeria. The 80,000 square meters multi-billion-naira resort that was meant to change the face of tourism in Nigeria is now a neglected piece of wasteland.
Our definition of enjoyment is to attend parties, hang out at the local joints and visit a family. And all of that is good and okay, don’t get me wrong, but it is grossly incapable of delivering the real experience because it limits the scope.
The rich may be able to go abroad for vacations but the modest can go to Obudu Ranch too – if only they want to.
Stop being so commercial. It is not only things that make you money that gives you joy. Start doing things that give joy and personal satisfaction
In the Western world, people save up in order to squeeze just one or two weeks of vacation each year. A vacation is a time to live the life you only imagined and to break the routine. It is proven to work magic in people’s mental lives.
If you are thinking the white man has money to do all of that and Nigerians don’t, you are wrong. The white man saves the money because he knows escaping for a few weeks is one of the most important experiences of life.
But living life to the fullest is not just about vacations.
Many have always wanted to play the piano or guitar, but was never able to get one while growing up. Why not get a cheap keyboard or guitar now and learn how to play?
You may have wanted to be an astronomer; it is time to get a telescope. And if you had wanted to be a DJ like yours truly, get a small DJ controller and let the music play.
You may have planned to learn how to do tie-and-die, learn it now! You may have wanted to do charity work, it’s time to start a non-profit or join one. You may desire a more active citizenry; become a community organizer and teach people how to be responsible citizens in the villages around you.
Do you want to dance, do you want to sing, do you want to read or write or just do bird-watching? Explore every form of opportunity. Why work for a retirement instead of just living?
Stop being so commercial. It is not only things that make you money that gives you joy. Start doing things that give joy and personal satisfaction!
Former American first lady, Eleanor Roosevelt, it was who said: “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”
Live life, my friends, while you still can.
